theexpandingshrink

Any good leader wants his decisions to lead to good outcomes for himself and the people he leads. Yet in the midst of the fear caused by a stressful situation he may settle for making a good decision rather than seeking by faith to hear the Lord’s answer. Making a good decision out of fear can lead to a toxic and undesired outcome.

Jesus said we must live by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God. As Christian leaders our greatest desire is to do and say as Jesus did, “I only do what I see the Father doing.” So how can we insure that our decisions are not just good decisions birthed out of fear, rather than Holy Spirit-led decisions of faith that lead to life and the blessing of God.

An examination of the contrasts in decision making between King Saul and David can help us in this quest to understand how to avoid fearful and toxic decision making. King Saul was told to wait till Samuel came to him. And Samuel would offer a sacrifice before Saul could proceed to attack the Philistines. (I Samuel 13)

But as Saul waited, his resources became depleted. His soldiers went from 3000 down to 600 in number. His men hid in caves and some switched sides. Meantime the enemy, the Philistines, were increasing in number. In other words, King Saul’s assets were decreasing and his liabilities were increasing. In fearful desperation Saul did what many good men have done, he examined the worsening situation and he made a ‘good judgment call’. A good judgment call is the best we can do in a bad situation. But as leaders we are called to do more than make good judgment calls. We are called to wait upon the Lord till he gives us His word; we are called to trust the Lord that He will appear in our overwhelmingly difficult decision and reveal His glory. His glory is the sum of who He is and what He has and what He can do.

Saul’s ‘good judgment call’ led to the loss of his destiny. Samuel said, ” You acted foolishly in offering the sacrifice out of your anxiety; now the Lord is going to take the Kingdom from you. He is going to give the Kingdom to a man who is eager to know the mind and will of God more than he is anxious to make a good decision.” In other words God is going to choose a man after His own heart, a man of faith. And as we know, the man He chose was David.

Some time later, David, the man anointed to become king, was leading 600 armed men. While he was away on a campaign, his enemies burned his village and carried off his wives and children and the wives and children of his men. David and his men were grief stricken. The men turned their grief on David, their leader, and wanted to kill him (I Samuel 30). So here David’s assets were decreased and his liabilities were overwhelmingly increased. But David, unlike Saul, did not focus on making a good decision. Rather he “strengthened himself in the Lord,” and he sought the will of the Lord. He was a man after God’s heart, not a man after the best decision. Upon learning the will of God, he proceeded in faith to an amazing victory.

In a crisis we are all tempted to latch on in fear to something to guide us through the uncertainties of an overwhelmingly difficult situation. In our anxiety we grab on to things that have served us well in the past. What we do not see is that good things from our past are not the same as the will of God for this situation. By clinging to a good thing, we make it an idol. An idol is anything that we place above the will of God. And as Jonah said in his prayer of insight from the fish’s belly,

“Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs.” (Jonah 2:8)

What are some good things that have served us well in the past that can become idols when given a priority over the voice of the Spirit?

First, policy and procedures are good things that have served us well. Having a process and a way of proceeding is a good thing. A process is an orderly approach that is agreed upon ahead of time as a way of dealing with a given situation. As organizations we have manuals of policies and procedures. As we mature as organizations the book of policies and procedures becomes thicker. We learn new things from our experiences and we say “Let’s develop a policy for that so that the next time we will have a prescribed way through the situation that will hopefully lead to a good outcome.” When faced with a new difficulty, we refer to our manual and we decide we will follow our polices and procedures in this matter. At the conclusion of the matter, we review how the matter was handled, and we may then congratulate ourselves that we have done the right thing because we followed our guidelines. No one can criticize us because we have followed our guidelines, and we have good guidelines. We are right because we did the right thing.

However following guidelines and procedures, no matter how good they are, is not the same as following the Holy Spirit. As Jesus said, “The Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath.” Our policies and procedures are made to serve us and help us, they were not made to be our Lord and Savior. Consulting the policy manual before and above consulting the Holy Spirit leads to a carnal outcome, not a Holy Spirit-directed outcome.

Secondly, people with expertise have served us well. We all know the value of consulting the expert. If you have a brain tumor, consult a neurosurgeon and not your mechanic. However consulting experts is not the same as consulting the Holy Spirit. After 40 days of fasting in the wilderness, a nutritional expert would have undoubtedly told Jesus, “You need to follow a careful diet to regain your normal eating pattern. And bread can be a part of your re-entry diet.” But Jesus said, “I am not going to allow my hunger to define me. I will not let an expert in the things of the world, even though his advice is admired and respected all over the world, direct me. I will only proceed with the word from heaven.” As a result of Jesus faithfulness, he was nurtured by angels from heaven.

Experts make informed judgment calls. A true expert is not a technician who has a check list of signs or symptoms which he marks off and says, “This person has several of the signs of this illness so he has the illness.” The true expert examines the check lists, but he then makes a clinical judgment based on a complex interplay of what he knows from past experience and the present presentation. But as we all know, even experts can disagree. One expert says, “Operate;” the other says, “Do not operate.”

In the end we honor the experts, but we use them as consultants. We do not elevate them to a position as lords of the situation. We hear their advice, and we take it before the Lord and ask him for His expertise in how we should handle the various counsels we have received. Experts can be a blessing, but if they are elevated above and before the Holy Spirit, the outcome can be spiritually disastrous.

Thirdly, our own personal experiences teach us many good things. A child learns not to touch a hot stove through personal experience. We learn not to trust certain people because we have been hurt by people like them in the past. For example, we tend to be wary of strangers. This is a good guideline. Do not pick up hitchhikers; do not engage with strangers while hiking alone on a remote trail. But sometimes our personal experience prevents us from experiencing the new thing God wants to do in our lives. So the writer of scripture says, “Do not fail to entertain strangers because some have entertained angels unawares.”

And sometimes our experience distorts our ability to assess the present situation. For example, if I have been severely wounded emotionally by a person, it may affect my ability to relate to any person who reminds me of the one who wounded me. So, yes, experience is a wonderful teacher. But if our experiences are consulted before and above the voice of the Holy Spirit, our assessment of a situation can be severely distorted and the resulting decision can be very misleading, if not destructive.

A tragic consequence of good men making good decisions and not giving the Holy Spirit priority is that good men become enraged at anyone who challenges their good decisions by calling for a Spirit-inspired decision. The Pharisees were the experts with the experience and knowledge and laws for handling every situation. They became murderously angry when Jesus healed on the Sabbath. They accused him of rebellion against Moses and of being motivated by the devil. King Saul wanted to kill his son Jonathan because Jonathan had rebelled against his word by eating honey after an exhausting day of battle. (I Samuel 14: 24 -45).

In this situation the Spirit-directed person can be tempted to come under the same spirit of accusation. They can take pride in following the Holy Spirit. “I follow the Holy Spirit, and you follow the ways of man. I am right and you are wrong.” And so we are never in so much danger of being wrong as when we are right. The one who says, ” I am right because I have followed the best procedures, consulted the best experts, and have been guided by my best judgments” may well be wrong because he has not consulted the voice of God. And the person who says, “I am right because I have consulted the Holy Spirit” may be wrong because of a proud and arrogant attitude.

In the end we say, “Oh, Jesus, cleanse my heart of pride; give me a heart of love for those with whom I disagree and give me the courage and faith to humbly move according to the direction of your Holy Spirit, not fearing what man can do to me.”

And in response to this prayer, Jesus gives us the grace that He has promised to all those who seek Him first. And we receive the grace to which we are entitled because we cling to Him in faith and not to worthless idols.

E. Daniel Martin

I was thinking about Elisha the Old Testament prophet today (II Kings 6:8-23) while I was husking corn and talking with my daughters. Elisha would report to the king of Israel about where the enemy had planned an ambush for him. Was Elisha eavesdropping on hell or was he hearing from heaven in order to gain accurate information about the plans of the enemy? I do believe he was hearing from God about the dangers that lurked in what had been assumed to be safe places.

I began to ask myself, where might situations we assume are safe have unexpected dangers in which Satan attempts to ambush us. I may have begun this train of thought because my daughters were talking about and pondering the best options for the schooling of their children. One could decide, “I will send my children to the local public school; that will certainly be a safe option. Or another could decide, ” I will send my child to a private, Christian school; that will certainly be a safe option. Still another could decide, ” I will home school my child; that will certainly be a safe option. Yet an ambush could be planted in any of these “safe” places to potentially rob the child of faith.

So how can we proceed in faith and not in fear, yet be wise to the potential dangers even in “safe” places. I believe God does want to warn us of the ambushes of the enemy. We walk in safety and in confidence if we submit even safe decisions to Him for his counsel. “Heavenly Father, what is your will for me in this matter? I want your will to be done on earth even as it is done in heaven.”

So I say to my daughters; ” Listen carefully and respond to His voice and then move with confidence and joy that He will protect you from every ambush of the enemy. But even if you are ambushed, know that ” those who are with us are greater than those who are against us.”

So that is what we talked about as we were doing a 1000 ears of corn today.

Last year 2011 I termed the ‘Year of the woman who touched Jesus garment.‘  I told that story dozens of times in prison and out.  Each time I came to richer understanding of the story. Recently at the concert for Molly , Nicole Mullins sang a song about that biblical incident. I was told later that the LifeGate people immediately thought of me  because I had told this story so often.  The punch line of that story is: ‘You wanted to be healed from your ‘issue’ but I had a lot more for you than that; therefore I kept looking for you and I call you ‘daughter’ because I want a relationship with you.’

This year I feel led to live with the story from Mark 7: 24-30.  I invite you to join me in reflecting over a period of time on this passage. It deals with our approach to Jesus.  It tells us how to negotiate ‘when we have no rights at all.’  As someone said, this woman immediately understood the gospel.  The Gospel: “I am more wicked than I ever believed but at the same time more loved and accepted than I ever dared to hope.” 

Is your tent a museum of past failures and disappointments. or is it filled with living reminders of the goodness of the Lord.

Ruth and I visited a castle/museum in Ghent, Belgium and left feeling somehow depressed and anxious.

We had gone to Belgium along with our 14 year old granddaughter, Hannah, daughter of our oldest daughter Gwen and her husband Chauncey Martin  to visit our son Vaughn, his wife Ilona and their three daughters Elisa, 14; Ruby, 12; and Julie, 7.

On Monday, January 2nd, we went to Ghent and toured a castle built in the middle ages. The castle has now been turned into a museum of the torture items used in the Spanish Inquisition.  During that time Christians tortured and killed other Christians. It was truly a dark time in our history. We came out of the castle distressed with all we had seen and grateful that we did not live in those dark ages.

But somehow remembering all the evil that had occurred made us more sensitive to the evil that is occurring  in our world today. We say we are glad things are better now in comparison to the Dark Ages but our prophets are predicting  new dark ages.  Some are saying that our economy will completely collapse in 2012 and that there will be violence in the streets in places that had previously been secure.   So, where shall we turn and how shall we position ourselves for the darkness ahead?

I was encouraged this morning by the Holy Spirit through a word from scripture.  In I Samuel 17: 54 we read that after David had killed Goliath, “David took the Philistine’s head and brought it to Jerusalem, and he put the Philistine’s weapons in his own tent.” 

These weapons were a constant and daily reminder to David of the Lord’s faithfulness.  David could go into his tent and see and remember all that the Lord had done for him.

Imagine with me what else David may have had in his tent. Possibly he had a bear skin rug and a lion skin rug. Possibly he had the five stones he had chosen from the brook as he prepared to kill Goliath.

Maybe in the evenings before he confronted Goliath,  David recalled the history of the people of God. He recalled how as the flooded Jordan river parted and the Israelites entered the promised land through a dry river bed, God had instructed them to choose twelve stones from the river bed and carry them into the Promised Land as a reminder of God’s faithfulness.  Maybe as David thought of challenging Goliath he thought again of those stones. And he then thought , “I need me some stones”. So he goes and chooses five stones; and as he handles those stones he can just see Goliath’s name written all over that one stone. And suddenly he begins to pray and praise the Lord as a “giant killing anointing” comes upon him.

After the victory over Goliath, imagine David sitting in his tent. He would rub his feet on the bear skin rug, gaze at the armor of the defeated Goliath and roll those stones in his hands. He would recall that he himself was the greatest trophy of the grace of God. Then David would remember and remember and he would shout and praise the Lord. And so David would become a full time worshiper and and a part time warrior. (inspired by an article by Bill Yount)

We may go to a museum on rare occasions, some more frequently but few of us live in a museum. We need daily reminders of the faithfulness of the Lord to get us through the gathering storm.

What is in your tent?  Is your tent a  museum of past failures and disappointments or is it filled with living reminders of the goodness of the Lord.

I do believe that God gives us the Holy Communion as a daily reminder of his faithfulness. “As you take this bread, remember how much I love you. I loved you enough to die for you. Eat this bread and remember and celebrate my love.”

“And this cup is the new covenant in my blood. Drink this cup and remember and celebrate all that I have given you for the living of this day. All that I have is yours. I give you my strength, my Spirit. I give you my garments of righteousness. I give you my sword, the sword of my spirit which is the word of God.

So turn your tent into a cathedral of remembering and of worship and praise, 24/7, and then in your left over time go out and do mighty exploits in your family and in your work place in the strong name of Jesus!

On Sunday evening, December 18,2011 the LifeGate Congregation of Elizabethtown partnered with Don and Kathy Hess and family in a birthday celebration for Molly Hess who turned 18 on the 18th of December. The grand celebration was held at the Leffler Auditorium of Elizabethtown College at 6:30 pm. Nearly 600 people joined in the celebration. Nicole C. Mullen, a nationally and internationally known Christian musician conducted a one hour concert as part of the celebration. Members of the LifeGate congregation participated in many ways: on the planning committee for the event, in publicity for the event, in ushering, in producing a video of Molly’s life; in writing and performing a special song for Molly, in leading the worship as a team, in ministering in word and song during the event and in praying for the event.

We prayed that first of all the Lord’s name would be lifted up, that His love would be celebrated. We prayed that the evening would be about Him and not any of us. We prayed  that Nicole C. Mullen, in spite of her great fame, would minister in  a spirit of humility that lifted up the name of Jesus and not her own gifting. We prayed that even mistakes would turn out to the glory of God and  that  there would be a strong sense of the presence of God in the meeting. And yes we prayed that Molly would be healed; that she would speak a word indicating that she does understand the love of the father and the mother and the brothers and the sisters.

And God did answer prayers. There was a strong sense of the glorious  presence of the Lord in the meeting. People were encouraged, inspired, lifted up with new faith and love. Molly did not rise up and walk or talk but somehow there was a peace about being in the presence of God with her and knowing that God loves her and will not withhold any good gift from her or from us. We are content knowing that in His own time He will make all things clear and no good thing will be withheld from Molly or us. And in the time before all things are clear or mended, we continue in faith and hope and love.

We all sang in our hearts with Sonya Pena as she sang the song she had composed over Molly which she entitled,  ‘Molly’s Song’:

You were sitting on the edge of the crowd

Feeling cold and a little left out;

The Father’s eyes scanned the room

And gently fell upon you;

He drew you out of the many
And said, “I have a special plan for you, Molly.”

Molly, did you know
That your weakness lets His power be shown?

And, Molly, did you know
That your worship makes your heart His throne?

And did you know that in all these years
He’s never left you alone?

Did you know…
His love, like a fire burns to make you whole
His arms,

They enfold you through the questions of your soul

Molly, did you know,

That your destiny was planned before your birth?

And, Molly, did you know there’re no words

To express your great worth?

And did you know that in Christ’s kingdom

The last become first?

Did you know?

Now on this your 18th birthday

Surrounded by friends and family

Can you hear your heavenly Father say,

Molly, did you know that I sing, I sing—

Molly, I sing over you‛

As Sonya sang this song over Molly, as Molly sat in her wheel chair next to the piano, a tear was noticed in Molly’s eye. And as the tear slowly trickled down Molly’s cheek, Sonya’s voice  broke as she sang, for she thought, “Molly does understand; she is moved by what is happening tonight.”

Don Hess, Molly’s father gave a  moving tribute to God and Molly. He testified that “We are an ordinary people …holding hands with an extra-ordinary God”. And the evening continued with strong and joyous worship led by the LifeGate worship team, followed by the powerful worship experience through the voice of Nicole C. Mullen. Nicole ministered passionately, humbly and very evangelistically. People were touched by Christ’s presence in her ministry.

Then there was an inspiring word by Lou Goszleth, a beloved pastoral friend of the LifeGate congregation, who directed many of his comments directly to Molly. Finally Doug Lamb sang a powerful song the Lord gave him entitled “This is the Hour.” and invited the audience to join in. An invitation was given for people to come forward for prayer and Don Lamb concluded the service by an invitation to contribute to the community through a free will offering.

The concert expenses had been covered by friends of the Hess family and by the LifeGate congregation so all of the offering could go to one of four community purposes: Cornerstone Youth Center, Love INC, Churches That Care and to build a community playground in the LifeGate community.

And God blessed this event and gave great favor in the community. We received free publicity about the event in an article on the Religion page of the local Lancaster newspaper, The Intelligencer Journal on Saturday morning just prior to the event. Then on Monday morning, the day after the event, there was a very positive front page article, again in the Intelligencer, reporting on the birthday event/ concert along with pictures.

What congregation would not wish for a  positive front page article about a congregational event? So, yes, we were favored by God and man. But what shall we make of this? How shall we understand it? What shall we do with this?

In reflecting on this entire event, we can make the following points:

1. This event occurred in the context of the congregation seeking the Lord in an especially focused way in the ’90 Days of Transformation’. In this period there was increased prayer and fasting and longing to draw nearer to God. In this context the Lord came to Don Hess in the middle of the night inspiring him to plan this event.  This is not unlike an event in Acts 13:1-3: “In the church at Antioch there were prophets and teachers…   While they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.”  Likewise, while we were worshiping and praying and fasting the Spirit came to Don Hess and said ‘plan this event to celebrate the Father’s love’.

2. The Spirit not only came on Don Hess, the Spirit came on the entire congregation with inspiration and giftings and a strong desire to contribute those giftings to the event. Everyone who heard of the event was moved by the Holy Spirit with the strong sense that this was ‘God’s doing and it was marvelous in our eyes.’

3. The Holy Spirit stirred up a spirt of prayer throughout the congregation. Prayer was made persistently and corporately for Molly, the Hesses and this event and all who were a part of the event. There was special prayer for Nicole C. Mullen, not that she would be gifted in song, but that her gift would totally lift up the Father’s name.

4.  The Holy Spirit stirred a spirt of humility. No one participating wanted to draw attention to themselves or to their gifting either individually or corporately.  LifeGate as a congregation was mentioned in the publicity but did not use this as an opportunity to promote their own congregational interests in the community.

5. The Holy Spirit gave a strong love for the larger body of Christ and a strong desire to bless and serve the community and larger body of Christ.  Although LifeGate is committed to developing a community playground and could use every penny we could get for that purpose, there was the strong sense that the proceeds from this concert should serve the community and not primarily LifeGate.

6. The Holy Spirit gave the congregation the grace to die to self interest.

7. The Holy Spirit gave the congregation a spirit of unity and joy in working together.

8. The Holy Spirit gave the congregation a stronger sense of identity as a part of the family of God.  This clearer sense of who we are as a congregation allows us to relate more effectively with persons of other congregations in the community be they denominational or nondenominational. May the Lord use this to build up the whole body of Christ.

So, in light of these  blessings of God, how shall we proceed from here:

1. Continue to seek God’s grace to die to ourselves and our selfish interests every day. Jesus said, “If any man (or congregation) would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.

2. Stay focused on Jesus and not on the favor we may or may not receive. He said if we follow him we will not always be favored, in fact we will be persecuted if we faithfully bear HIs name and proclaim His will and word. So we will continue to seek His favor and let him take care of whether or not we receive the favor of others.

3. Continue to seek to serve others.  Continually ask, “How can I come under a brother or sister or other congregation and lift them up so that they shine brighter?”

4. Continue in worship and prayer and fasting, confident that the Spirit will again speak, directing us as to the next event He is calling us to do for Him, be it individually or corporately.

-submitted by edm

Yesterday I spent time writing up the stories in the article I am sharing with you in this email.  But I became exhausted by the end of the day and did not have the energy to finish my analysis of the stories. But maybe that depletion of creativity was the Holy  Spirit’s way of saying, ‘ I have a better plan.”  I am sensing that the better plan is to share these stories with a select group of people and to invite their responses.  And then to reflect on and integrate and share their responses.

I think this storytelling format is great and we could use it in some LifeGate settings.

This is not an assignment.  Do not respond unless you feel led to. Hopefully you will enjoy the stories.

E. Daniel

The Stories We Tell

The stories we tell, they tell on us. In the midst of telling a series of events we reveal our hearts. We reveal what is important; what is painful; what brings joy; what are the things we value and what are the things that put us in turmoil and conflict; what are the things we grieve and what are the things in which we delight.  At some level we want to be understood. But we are not always certain that it is safe to reveal our deepest longings. So we tell stories, sometimes to reveal and sometimes to hide our true feelings.

We listen to one another’s stories. We listen to what is said and what is not said. We listen to what is stirred up within our own emotions by the other person’s story. We trust that as we listen we will understand . And if we understand we will be able to more fully appreciate the other. Then relationships will deepen and distances between brothers and sisters will be shortened. That  is the hope. And thus we dare to tell our stories.

It was no doubt because of sentiments like those just expressed that the Lancaster Mennonite Historical Society planned an evening of story telling at 7 pm on September 19, 2011 at the James Street Mennonite Church. Two story tellers were chosen. The instructions were simple: each tell a story followed by the other, till each had told seven stories, each a story of 2 to 4 minutes in length. The story tellers were to avoid sermonizing or commenting on one another’s stories or allowing the other’s story to influence the story they told. They were to tell stories that revealed their humanity.

The two persons chosen were presented as exceptional Mennonite leaders. These leaders were in many ways polar opposites.

Miriam Book, Swiss-German, grew up in Lancaster County in a stable Mennonite farm family. Growing up she was actively involved in the Paradise Mennonite Church where her father was a pastor. As an adult she worked in a number of Mennonite institutions: Eastern Mennonite Missions, Philhaven Hospital. She was lead pastor at Salford Mennonite Church; worked at Mennonite headquarters at Elkhart Indiana and now is an interim pastor of a large Mennonite Church in Nebraska. She married later in life to Jim Lapp, a Mennonite leader whose first wife had died.

Lawrence Chiles, an African American grew up in a troubled family in Bronx, New York. He spent time in prison and later was helped to freedom from drugs through a time at Teen Challenge. He was influenced and shaped by many different church groups within the Christian family: Pentecostal, evangelical  and Mennonite. He got a college degree and then a masters degree. He is now pursuing a doctorate. He has founded three different community centers, successfully pastored a number of urban churches and worked at Eastern Mennonite Missions as a consultant to churches in urban settings.. He is married to Neireida, a nurse with Puerto Rican ancestry. They have three adult children and a number of grandchildren. Lawrence is presently bishop of a network of  25 churches called Koinonia Fellowship of Churches. This network is part of Kingdom Life Network, a global fellowship of churches, a number of whom have Mennonite roots.

Following is a summary of the stories as they were given during the evening:

Miriam #1.  I have long had a call to pastor. I had had multiple opportunities to preach earlier my life but I was not affirmed as a pastor. Finally in the year 2000 I found myself behind the pulpit as a pastor. I asked myself, “What is my identity as a female pastor?” I met a woman who said to someone about me, “There is my pastor”. I was identified as “ my pastor.”  This felt good. A parishioner asked me to pray for her on the phone. This increased my sense of what it means to be a pastor. One day I saw three little girls behind the pulpit playing with a microphone. I realized my journey was catching on. I said to them, “Little girls can preach too.”

Lawrence #1.  I grew up in a family of nine brothers and sisters. My father was a hermit and mother was shy.  My primary school teacher always made me feel good when she would say to me, “Good morning, little Lawrence.”  I began to think, “She likes me.” One day I asked to see her after school. I said, “Could you and I get married, Mrs. Jones?”  She thought for a minute and then said, that any one she married would have to do well in math. So I worked hard and improved my math grade. Then I went back and asked again if she would marry me. She agreed that my math had  improved. She said that she would marry me under two conditions. One, her husband would have to agree and two I could not tell any of the other boys. I agreed to her terms and one afternoon after school we had a little ceremony, just the two of us, and I married Mrs. Jones.

Miriam #2.  Over time I became aware of how aware I was of ‘what will people think’.  People usually thought good things about me and my sisters.  I remember hearing, “Aren’t those little girls cute”  As an adult I was working in marketing at Philhaven Hospital, a psychiatric hospital.. One day as I was leaving the building I saw some old acquaintances.  I had the sudden thought , “What if they should think I am a patient?”  I quickly made certain that my employee identification badge was quite visible as I greeted and passed them in the hallway. As I reflected on this I was surprised that I was still strongly affected by what people think about me. This was a blind spot revealed to me.

Lawrence #2. The 1960s were a troubling time for a lot of people including people in my school. Ms. Laverne Arnold was a Messianic Jewish teacher of mine. One day she said to me, “I noticed you were not rowdy today. Would you like to learn about Jesus?” I did not know who Jesus was but I appreciated her warmth and friendliness so I agreed to meet with her after school to learn about Jesus. And so this woman introduced me to Jesus. Years later a Mennonite preacher with dandruff on his coat loved me and discipled me. He taught me how to pray.

Miriam #3. This is a story passed down in my family about my father’s mother, Grandma Book. Early one morning Grandma Book saw a rat run through her kitchen. She was so frightened that she jumped up on the table and remained there till her husband came in from the barn. When he came in from the barn she anxiously informed him about the rat. He stated, “Just relax, I am certain you did not see a rat in this house.” To settle the disagreement he brought the dog into the kitchen to smell if there was a rat.  Rather quickly the dog flushed out the rat grabbed it in his mouth and shook it vigorously.  Suddenly the dog lost its grip on the rat in mid shake and the rat flew through the air and landed on Grandmother Books lap.

Lawrence #3.  While our children were still quite small we were working in voluntary service in a Pentecostal church in Rehersburg, PA.  Finances were tight and we had to make do with little. At one point someone gave us a large crate of oatmeal of all flavors. We tried to be thankful as we ate oatmeal day and night, trying to do more with less.  One day my son said, “Is this oatmeal the best we can do? My Sunday School teacher said that God owns a lot of cows so why don’t we ask for a cow?”  So my son prayed, “Please dear God could you give us a cow to eat.   Three weeks later a knock came at the door. An Amishman said I have just butchered a cow and I felt God nudging me to bring the meat to you in this house. Could you use this meat?”

My son immediately responded, “See dad, my teacher was right. God does have alot of cows and he had one just for us.”

Miriam #4.  As a single woman into my middle adult life, I often felt the pressure to marry. Although I had opportunities none seemed quite right. Then I found myself in love and planning a wedding. My friends encouraged and joined me in planning a ritual to recognize the importance of grieving the loss of singleness as I prepared to embrace my new married life.  Friends came bringing food to this event. As a part of the ritual I stepped from the sun room representing singleness to the living room representing marriage.  I crossed from the joy of singleness which few understand to the joy of marriage which many understand.

Lawrence #4   One day I was at home with the three children while my wife was at her nursing job.  It was a hot summer day. In mid afternoon the children came to me and said, “Dad, let’s pray for a miracle. And let’s allow God to choose the miracle.”  So we prayed for a miracle. Shortly after finishing our prayer, a stranger  knocked on our door.  He said, “ I am sorry to interrupt you, but I have business here in the city and I need someone to watch my horse for a couple of hours. Do you know anyone who would be willing to do that?” My children and I immediately received this as the miracle. We went to a nearby park and invited all the neighborhood kids to join us for rides on the  horse. And so a rather boring afternoon was miraculously transformed into an event to remember. One of my daughters said at the end of the day, “Let’s pray for more miracles!”

Miriam #5. I was lead pastor at Salford for a number of years. During this time the church grew. These were good years. Then I was called to pastor a large Mennonite Church in Nebraska. This church had Russian Mennonite background in contrast to the Swiss German background of my prior experiences. In April we moved to Nebraska. We were warmly and graciously received by the people. We were given all kinds of food. As we were being welcomed I heard the soft murmur of doves. A woman gave me an afghan which she had made. She said, “I am not bribing you, I just want to express our joy and gratitude for your coming.  As I sat for the first time in this large, well filled church, I thought I could hear my mother say “Miriam, Miriam!”  I took this to mean that she was affirming my journey as a pastor. I recalled her having said earlier in life that maybe I would someday take my father’s place as pastor of Paradise Mennonite Church.

Lawrence #5.  I went to college in North Dakota. Soon after arriving on campus I was surprised to see the girl who had been engaged to my best friend.  When I asked her about Jerry she said that they had broken up.  I thought I would be a gentleman and I asked her out for dinner. In the course of our conversation at dinner that night I said, “ Since it did not work out with you and Jerry, why don’t you and I get married/” She was taken aback by this comment and responded, “You are uncouth.” Soon after this she announced her intentions to leave the campus and go to Puerto Rica. I said to her, “You can run but you can’t hide.” Several years later she came to my graduation. As I was stepping down from the platform after receiving my diploma, I saw Nereida standing in the front row. She was holding a sign with the single word “Yes” written in big letters.

Miriam #6. Stained glass windows have always beckoned me. There were no stained glass windows in my home church at Paradise Mennonite. But every summer a group of us would travel to northern Pennsylvania to hold a Summer Bible School. We used a small country church for the summer Bible School program. And I still remember the fascination I felt and the beauty of the stained glass windows of that little country church.  Later when I was studying at the London Bible College in England I recall gazing at the beautiful stained glass windows on which it was written, “Woe, to me if I preach not the Gospel.”  And now again in this Mennonite Church which I pastor are stained glass windows. One has a scene on which is written, “Glory to God in the highest; and another scene with the words, “Let the children come to me;” and a final scene with the words, “ Peace be onto you.” These stained glass windows have been like markers in my life.

Lawrence #6.  I as age 17 and I was in prison. I had grown up with an abusive father. I had a rather severe stuttering problem. I would often ride the subway to avoid school because of my shame at my stuttering problem.  I was not expecting to have God show up to me in prison because  I thought God only helped people who were saved.  And I was not saved.  But the Lord did show up and He said to me,  “I will be your God and you will not stutter.” God is still in my mouth!”

Miriam #7. My parents are now gone. It is a new season. It is at times painful to go to Book and Lapp family meetings.  We look through family scrap books and we remember.  It is difficult to sing “God be with you till we meet again.” Tears keep me from singing. Some are gone and some are ill.  One of the family has lost spouse but we are joyful the spouse is in a new place.. I remember that life is also about parting.

Lawrence #7. My wife is a nurse and she works in an HIV clinic in Philadelphia. Several years ago we moved in to Philadelphia. We moved into a largely Catholic community. It somehow became community knowledge that I was a bishop. The title means nothing to me but to these Catholics the title carried a certain aura. They are in a Catholic community.  One of my neighbors threw a large party at his house. He said to me, “Bishop do you drink?” I said yes I drink or I would die. He said come on over to my party and bring your favorite drink.” I got a bottle of grage juice that looks like wine. They all laughed at my grape juice. But then they said, “ Pray for us that this party will go well.” I prayed, “Dear Jesus, please show up at this party. “  Then as the evening wore on one at at time would come to me and begin to share their inner pain. One saie, “My son was just killed, and I can’t stand the pain of the loss.”  And so over time our home has become ‘The Nicodemous House’ where people of all stripes come at night.

Question and Answer Session 

Following the stories each story teller could ask a question of the other.

Lawrence to Miriam. How are you experiencing pastoring?

Miriam. I need to be in touch with the inner call.  I have found increasing confidence in ministering.

Lawrence. I grew up under a woman pastor who said she was called to help people like me. She was called to raise up and train leaders for the harvest.

Miriam to Lawrence. What was the most difficult sermon for you to preach.

Lawrence. The most difficult sermon for me to preach was the sermon I preached after a fight with my wife.  I could hardly wait till the sermon was over to apologize.

Favorite pass time of Story Tellers

Miriam.  GardenIng ..

Lawrence.  Restoring old clocks.

E. Daniel’s response to Don Hess, father of Matt who plays defense for the Blazers,  the Lancaster Mennonite High School soccer team that won the state championship on Friday night, November 18, 2011

Subject: Tell me it is really true

What a delightful bedtime story: good things happen to good people!  Tell me again that it is really true.

In this age of cynicism and fallen heroes when happy valleys are devastated by raging flood waters of bitter shame, tell me that somewhere good is really good. Tell me that the coaches did not abuse the boys, that the parents did not bribe the referees and that the boys did not cheat on their exams.

Tell me that tomorrow we will still hold our heads up high; that there will be no headlines of secret steroid use or of drunken brothel brawls.

And tell me that as the years pass and distant events give way to cloudy recall, one memory will hold its own: the cold night in November 2011 in the sweetest place on earth when good things really did happen to good people.

And tell me that this was only the beginning of good things; that succeeding years had more momentous victories. And finally tell me that each one of this great team makes the final goal and hears the welcome words, ‘Well done, good and faithful servants. Enter into the joys of thy Lord.’

E. Daniel